Betrayed by Junk Food

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Alica Mckenna-Johnson, Chocolate

Chocolate Understands

So it’s one of those mornings and the adult part of my brain that was trying to get me to work out, lost. Which means it is now time for junk food. So I am pondering what to eat when I realize that I no longer have my junk food favorites. Sure I can order Chinese, but I want something now and the restaurant isn’t open yet.

Deep sigh.

So I head to the store but what can I get?

I’m vegetarian gluten and dairy free- by allergy not choice. What in hell can I eat???

Junk food is supposed to mask my emotions not make unhappy ones. Is junk food now betraying me??

I slog through the aisle trying not to cry because explaining why I’m sobbing in front of the display of macaroni and cheese is not something I want in my police records.

Then I see them, the one food that is obviously a gift from the gods because it spans the healthy food junk food yummy barrier, AVOCADOS. Carefully I fondle select two perfect avocados and head to the chips. Picking a bag of organic blue corn chips, that were on sale, I scurry to the froze food section where I grab a box of vegan, gluten free taquitos and coconut based caramel ‘ice cream’.

I have succeeded! The Universe loves me. I can now go home and medicate my sorrow in junk food that won’t make me pray for the grim reaper to come for me the next day.

As I prepare my feast I will listen to this lovely, happy making teaser from the BBC radio 4 production of Neil Gaimin’s Neverwhere. Benedict Cumberbatch is singing.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0169jdc

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