Category Archives: Parenting

Vengeance is MINE!!!!!

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Alica Mckenna-Johnson, honey, sweet vengance

photo by alsjhc

I have waited fourteen long, trying years but finally the sweet honey taste of vengeance is mine to savor.
My daughter has fallen in love with a book, The Fault In Our Stars, and she was sitting on the couch reading—totally lost to the world. Smiling, I sat down next to her and started to talk to her.

I asked her random questions.

I hugged her.

I lay on her arm.

I moved her book so I could see what she was reading.

She screeched at me to leave her alone.

She complained how annoying I am.

She pushed me away.

Finally she stormed off into her room.

And I laughed, and hubby laughed, and after fourteen years of her interrupting us when we sat down to read, finally it was my turn to drive her crazy.

I can still taste the honey sweetness of revenge on my tongue.

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Molding My Daughter Into a Joss Whedon Girl

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Photo by RavenU

I don’t mean this to be creepy, I’m not preparing my daughter to become his concubine, or join his harem or anything like that, although for the right price I might sell her ….

And, yes, she is a fangirl, and can sing all the songs from Once More With Feeling, and Dr. Horrible’s Sing-a-long Blog. Yes, yes, I am very proud.

What I mean is I am trying to make my daughter into a badass warrior woman: Buffy, Zoe, Faith (but not when she was evil), River, Willow (again not when she was evil), and Kaylee you know what I’m talking about.

I want my daughter to be a badass. I want her to carry throwing stars tucked into her belt, I want the loser who puts drugs in girls’ drinks to be afraid the minute she steps into a room, I want my daughter to be able to back her ‘no’, and not wait for someone else to save her.

Hair and attitude ready for ass-kickings!

And it would be great if she looked awesome and had terribly clever things to say while kicking ass. No one likes a boring heroine.

Joss showed us that strong, powerful, fearless, kick ass woman can be beautiful, compassionate, and accessorize any outfit.

And that is what I want for my daughter.

So those of you with daughters what movie characters do you hope they grow up to become?

Action movies, best parent guide ever!

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This post was inspired by this Facebook conversation.

Logan McKenna: My mum just called me a wuss/loser. So I’m putting it up for a vote and letting y’all decide whether I’m a wuss/loser. lol
Stewart: god no

Rachael: I agree with stewart!

Logan McKenna: Thanks guys 🙂

Emily: no freaking way

Alica Mckenna Johnson: RUDE! He wasn’t able to do a hand stand push up. A mom has to have standards.

Logan McKenna: Hey, I wasn’t able to stay balanced after doing the push up.

Alica Mckenna Johnson: No excuses!! Would a Navy Seal be whining like this? I think not!

Logan McKenna: I was stating a fact not whining 😛

Alica Mckenna Johnson: whatever. It was in your tone.

Logan McKenna: How can you tell what my tune is over text? and so far it’s 4 to 1

Alica Mckenna Johnson: TONE your tone of voice, but the tune you are humming is also very whiny.

Logan McKenna: What tune was I humming? I don’t remember humming anything, unless you are saying that the hum of my heart is whining

Alica Mckenna Johnson: I didn’t want to say so in front of your friends but yes, yes it is.

Logan McKenna: Haha. I know there was a reason I liked to hang out around you just after I worked out so that my humming heart would annoy you

Alica Mckenna Johnson: lol. You’re such a brat
Logan McKenna: I am, and proud of it. And this brat is going to Circle K to get a Dr. Pepper

So this conversation got me thinking, what are the standards I have for my son? I thought long and hard about this, echoes from my feminist upbringing urging me to use words like sensitive, understanding, able to cook. And all of that is great but really I want my son to be able to do handstand push-ups on a bed of nails. Recycle glass bottles and fabric when he makes his Molotov cocktails, and dance to ‘Party Rockin’ while picking out the drug lord he needs to take out.

Logan in a most cunning hat.

Yes I want my son to be an action movie hero, with enough kung-fu movie hero to make him extremely lethal, and a dash of Joss Whedon hero because then he would have witty one liners and could cook.

Someday instead of Chuck Norris sayings there could be saying about Logan.

When Logan goes to save a puppy, angels cry at his compassion.

When Logan goes home, he travels over buildings because gods don’t walk upon the street.

When Logan gets diamonds for his mum, he makes them by hand.

So what movies have inspired your parenting skills?