Being self-centered rocks!


Today during yoga I was totally self-centered. It was just about me and my mat.

I didn’t think about how I looked to others.

Or how I was doing compared to the teacher.

I let go of my desire to push myself trying to prove the tubby middle aged woman does belong in the class.
And while I made a note that I need a tank top under my shirt, I didn’t worry about who could see down it.
Instead I just did yoga. Not perfect, awe-inspiring yoga. My yoga. Yoga that pushed my boundaries and help me connect to my body. Yoga that I did with my eyes closed half the time because it helps me keep my weight even on both sides of my body.

I felt at peace after yoga. I was sweaty, stinky, a bit shaking, and totally happy because I had taken time to be self-centered and focus on me.

It made me wonder what other things should I do while completely focused on me. How could I improve on things if I managed to set aside time and space to do them completely focused on me and not trying to manage kids, keep an eye on dinner, and write.

What about you? Are you ever self-centered? How does it help you?

The song for today is Falling Slowly from the movie Once. I’m sure I’ve used it before, but I just adore it!

10 responses »

  1. I just love yoga, the mat is the one place it doesn’t feel selfish to make it all about me! Of course, you’re right…there should be other areas of our love we are willing to fully engage in. Our passion (aka writing) and other types of me-time. Hmmm…you’ve given me something to think about, thanks. 🙂

  2. I think we all have to be self-centered to an extent. Even volunteer work is selfish in a way, as many of us do it to feel great. 😉 So glad you take some you-time through yoga. Such a beneficial exercise and meditation form. You’re inspiring me to give it a whirl soon!

    • Your right we always live up to our vision of ourselves and even if we are helping others the choice to do so is rooted inside of us. I really like yoga, see what kids are offered near you, different types give people different things and I’m sure you’ll find something that will work for you.

  3. The thing about being self-centered is to avoid its being negative, one has to first be centered, and then know when and how to focus on self. It sounds like you are doing it just right.

  4. I am reminded of a workshop I went to, oh, let’s see, 25 years ago. The presenter said that women in our society have been taught to be selfless, to give of themselves to their familes, friends, communities, but not to give TO themselves. She went on to say that ‘selfless’ is a horrible word. It means ‘without a self.’ A car, she said, can’t give others rides with an empty gas tank, so why do we expect to be able to keep on giving when we are running on empty. When we fill ourselves up, then we have more to give to others. She then had us visualize several tanks–one for love, one for time, one for money, etc.–all the resources we needed and also gave to others. Then we were to draw a ‘minimum’ line on each tank. Whenever that resource starts to get too close to that line, we should stop and refill ourselves, or at least stop giving that resource away for awhile, until it is replenished.

    Obviously this had tremendous impact on me since I remember it, practically verbatim, 25 years later. It has helped me to be ‘self-centered’ without being ‘selfish’ (hopefully) or ‘selfless’ ever since.

    Thank you for this post, Alica. Reading it was a great way to end my evening!

    • I’m replying under Kassandra’s comment because it’s so great! I love the analogy with the tanks. I use a car as an nutritional analogy often, in that you wouldn’t put watered down, junky-gas in your wonderful car, just like you shouldn’t put empty-calories, processed-crap food in your body that you expect to do all the of things you demand of it. Also, never thought of ‘selfless’ as ‘without a self’. Wow–very powerful. Like Alica, said, sounds like a great workshop.

      Alica, I love yoga and don’t give myself the give of it very often. You’ve inspired me to put it back into my routine. 🙂

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